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(via jonwithabullet)

What’s great is that I can so readily remember every moment of Married With Children that I can look at any .gif of it and recite alongside it out loud. I say that’s great, but it’s kind of a handicap when it comes to convincing women to sleep with me. 

For whatever reason, when guy seems to know “too much” about any given topic, it is considered a weird and un-fuckable quality to have. And yet, women want a man who’s talented and ambitious, as if one doesn’t suggest the other. 

Thankfully, I have a plethora of other very “fuckable” qualities to my credit, so it’s not something I’m losing much sleep about. Plenty of un-fuckable qualities too, but, in aggregate, that puts me at right about “a drink or two and he could get it” territory. And that’s what we call coital mathematics, kids! 

Anyway, I apologize; it’s just that thinking of Married With Children always makes me wax philosophical about male-female relations and the social mores surrounding them.